Rough Draft 3.1: Grandpa, He Was Born This Way: A Rogerian Argument Pro Gay Adoption

Dear Grandpa,

I’ve decided to write you this letter because I honestly haven’t been able to get you out of my head for the past few weeks. The last conversation we had on the phone didn’t end too well, (since we both ended up arguing and avoiding talking to each other for the next few weeks) but I think it is time to bring up the topic once again. Now, I understand that you might possibly never agree with me, but I want to try to help you understand why I believe in gay rights and their right to adopt children. I hope you are willing to hear me out and to keep an open mind as I try to explain to you why I will always stand by my beliefs. In turn, I promise to do the same for you. 

First, I wanted to let you know that I do recognize where you are coming from. I realize that you were raised as a Roman Catholic,  and the catholic church is strongly opposed to homosexuality. For this reason, I wouldn’t want you to sacrifice your beliefs or religion in anyway. However, I wanted to let you know my point of view. The last time we talked, you pointed out a few verses from the bible that support the idea that God is against same sex practices. Just to refresh your memory a bit, below I’ve include two examples of verses that have stuck with me since then:
"You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female. It is an abomination." - Leviticus 18:6
"A man who sleeps with another man is an abomination and should be executed." - Leviticus 20:13
Anyone who comes across these verses in the Bible, particularly those that are more religious, will automatically become troubled by these words. Nobody wants to be thought of as an “abomination” to anyone, especially not in the eyes of the ones you love most. “God didn’t make a man and a woman for no reason. Being with another man is not natural and therefore, shouldn’t be done.” While those are both legitimate reasons you’ve repeatedly told me during our last conversation, I do not believe that homosexuality is a choice, therefore I certainly do not believe they should be denied the rights given to any heterosexual couple. (White, 58)

To me, homosexuality should not be considered an abomination; it’s a part of life. Homosexuality has been around since before Christ, not just the last few centuries it has been exploited by society. In fact, homosexuality was actually encouraged in both the Roman and Greek armies during ancient times. The thought was that men would fight more bravely to defend their country if they loved the people they were fighting with and would want to protect them. (Smith, 7)

In agreement, two men who want to be together do not lack the capability of being just as affectionate and loving with each other as they would be with someone of the opposite sex. It also does not hinder their ability of being responsible and capable of raising a family as well. Statistics have shown that children raised by same sex couples are just as intelligent as a children who were raised by a heterosexual couple. In fact, children who were raised in a single parent household are more likely to have more issues with self-esteem and discipline than those with gay parents. (Alfano, 7) I believe that anyone who wants to raise a child and proves that they are able of doing so should be given the opportunity.

In the Presidential Campaign Questionnaire of 2008, Obama was asked his opinion on gay couples adopting children. His response was “I believe there are too many children who need loving parents to deny one group of people adoption rights. A child will benefit from a healthy, loving home, whether the parents are gay or not." (Giordano, 23) Even if you do not agree that homosexuality is morally right, you can’t turn away from the amount of children without parents and in need of homes. A couple that has a steady income and has shown to be emotionally responsible should be given the same chances, regardless of their sexual preferences.

I have also been doing some research in biological anthropology and came across something applicable to homosexuality. From an evolutionary standpoint; if you accept the premise that everything we do from a reproductive standpoint is to better our gene pool, ie. everything affects our “fitness” and homosexuality has been proven have been around for 2000 years, why hasn’t this “poor gene” or “abomination” been weeded out? To put in simpler terms, it does not affect our ability to survive in any negative way. If it did, we would not be able to survive as a species and therefore, that undesirable trait would have died off. However, since it clearly has not died off yet, the trait cannot be awful from an evolutionary standpoint. (Larsen, 96)

Correspondingly, one of the biggest concerns facing our world today is over population. Why would we try to ban something that not only diminishes population (since two people of the same gender cannot reproduce) but also increases quality of living for those people who are already on this planet? Regardless of what you think about homosexuality, you must agree that taking kids out of foster homes and other unsavory conditions improves quality of life for them. As a religious person, you are supposed to be in support of generous and loving acts. Raising a child that is not biologically your own can definitely be considered an act of kindness.

Essentially, we both can agree that we should choose the good of an individual over an ideal. We can have our own ideals and hold true to them in ourselves, but what other people do to pursuit their happiness, which is protected by the 5th Amendment, is not something that we should impede on.

So, perhaps we can come to the compromise that, at the bare minimum, good effects of same sex marriage can outweigh the pitfalls. Parents who cannot have kids of their own get to raise children that are in desperate of said home. You can still respect your religion by not loving a man yourself and you can let other people be happy in their own lives and help the living conditions of children in need.

Can’t wait to see you again,

Jess

Works Cited

Alfano, Sean. "Kids Of Same-Sex Parents Do Fine - CBS News." Breaking News Headlines: Business, Entertainment & World News - CBS News. 12 Oct. 2005. Web. Mar. 2011.

Cathy, Smith A. "The History of Gays in the Military – The Sacred Band of Thebes." Suite101.com: Online Magazine and Writers' Network. 19 Dec. 2010. Web. Mar. 2011.

Giordano, Scott A. "Barack Responds to Human Rights Campaign Questionnaire." Organizing For America. 14 June 2007. Web. Mar. 2011.

Larsen, Clark Spencer. Our Origins: Discovering Physical Anthropology. New York: W.W. Norton &, 2008. Print.

White, Rev. Mel. "What the Bible Says - And Doesn't Say - About Homosexuality." Soulforce. 2011. Web. Mar. 2011.